Archive for July, 2009

Oh, *Bz. What will you do next?

Friday, July 17th, 2009

We are all familiar with the rise and ubiquity of the Starbucks coffee chain. They started up in the early 70s in Seattle, and by mid 1990s they were nationwide. A few years after that it seemed as if they were on every streetcorner of every major and minor city, inside of Targets, and at airports. The place certainly is polarizing - either you’re a yuppie who doesn’t give an “EFF” about local businesses and loves ordering their needlessly pretentious drinks, or you’re a hippie who hates establishment and capitalism and hate starbucks.

They’ve recently bombed, expanded and changed the product line numerous time (see: starbucks instant coffee), and essentially represent the ultimate small-to-big time story that every American loves in theory but hates in practice. They’ve become a symbol of imperialism, setting up shop around the world and raking in $4 for a large Venti cappuccino drink.

Regardless of the current public opinion, it’s about to get uglier. See, Starbucks has been shutting down stores because they over-extended itself (Astor Place, NYC: get off the southbound 6 train and you can see like 3 starbucks within eyesight). They closed some here in Chicago. This article, however, shows that Starbucks may be making a slow comeback - with a twist. they’re opening new stores under different monikers - trying to appeal to a local market that has forsaken and resented Starbucks for being a chain and supposedly shutting down local spots (however, it’s a fact that coffee shops located near where starbucks open up seem to fair better, perhaps due to society’s guilt of going to “the man” instead of the local guys). They’re taking notes at other shops, so they can emulate their non-Starbucksness. It’s really a pretty dirty strategy, and I don’t see how they intend on making it work and come out morally on top.

PS. I fucking love starbucks.

Cavalli’s Summer Vacation

Thursday, July 16th, 2009

Cavalli is an urban pooch;  A “Town Dog” if you will.  But he hates having to shit on the pavement and hes starting to get a little “stir-crazy.” Alas, hes being sent to summer camp for a month with Patti. I’m sure he will love it there, backyard, attention and licking up drops of spilled wine. I’ll miss him ;(

IKEA Bingo!

Tuesday, July 14th, 2009

We all have a love/hate relationship with Ikea. On one hand, you can furnish your apartment with nicely designed pieces on the cheap and have a modern feel and all the other college grads on your block will totes be jealous. On the other hand, the store itself is invariably a total clusterfuck clash of suburbia and urbanites negotiating the Jerkers and Billys and Markörs with extra-large shopping carts, big yellow bags, tiny yellow pencils, and lists galore. Don’t get me wrong, I like the place a lot - I’ve built many an Ikea item in my day, and glancing around my room, I can see 11 Ikea things without standing up. But going to the store requires hours of research and mental preparation - what if they don’t have this desk? what if they don’t have it in that color? how big is that wall?

So, last weekend, Katz, Emily, Adam and a few others went to Ikea. To make the trip as painless as possible, we created The IKEA BINGO sheet, expertly designed by Emily!
Basically, you get points based on what you see in the store. Not the products, but the people…because face it, that’s 99% of the ‘fun’ of Ikea - the people watching. Here’s our list, complete with my respective score:

I only scored a 9.

I only scored a 9. click to view bigger.

So, clearly, we have some point spread discrepancies…I mean, I only got one #2. and one of my #1s was because of Katz anyway (guess which one). Also, I’m really surprised we didn’t see couples arguing, girls struggling to put heavy boxes on flat carts, and especially no girls hitting on me. In retrospect, we also should have added something about awkward teenagers and over-enthusiastic moms because they were there in droves. Similarly, we’d love to hear your suggestions for IKEA BINGO. There is an editable file (Adobe Illustrator) available here, and a PDF available here….that way you can change the names or make changes if necessary! Enjoy!

Superior Judgment: Bruno

Monday, July 13th, 2009


BRUNO Rating: Totes Worth Seeing

I had been anxious to see Bruno especially after the debates on whether or not the film was homophobic. The first half of the movie focused on Bruno the character; the rest of the film centered around people’s reaction to Bruno.  I personally didn’t find the film to be homophobic. In fact, the movie concluded with a pro-homosexual sentiment (Elton John, Chris Martin, Bono and Sting singing and Snoop rapping “He’s gay and that’s OK”)

My pants hat is off to Sacha Baron Cohen. He made some brazen moves as Bruno, the gay Austrian D-lister. While he made me cry in laughter in some scenes, I was scared for Cohen’s life in others. I was more scared when Bruno went camping/hunting with three southern “gentlemen” than when he was with a “terrorist leader” (actually an ex-terrorist leader).

Is the movie real?
The film was more a mockumentary than a documentary; A collection of sketches with a mix of hired actors, non-acting “interview subjects,” and duped celebrities. For instance,  Paula Abdul was under the impression she’d be going on a Japanese game show and spectators of the cage fight were purposefully pissed off before taping.  Smart editing and false pretenses may have shown participant’s reactions unfairly but it certainly added to the film’s entertainment value (that’s why we went to see the film, right).

Overall
I was disappointed that the flick seemed to end abruptly. I’ve enjoyed watching Sacha Baron Cohen do interviews and attend movie premieres as Bruno almost more than the movie itself.  The film is funny - go see it for its entertainment value but don’t overlook the larger picture. Homophobia is still very much present today. Seeing this movie and “laughing with the gays” requires an understanding that Bruno is an extreme character and isn’t an accurate portrayal of the entire gay community. I’m afraid that too many people use Bruno as confirmation of their prejudice. Hopefully people will come out of watching this movie not just entertained but with a better understanding in the importance of equality and human rights.

Chicago Tribune Sure Knows Its Gatorade

Saturday, July 11th, 2009

I really like Gatorade. I know it’s mostly sugar, and questionable whether it is “Scientifically formulated to taste best when you need it most,” but it’s great. I know Adam Ponce is a fan too. They’ve gone through many different lines and varieties of the product, which is pretty significant considering it’s essentially watered-down chemicals. Everything from GatorGum to the EDGE (Ergonomically Designed Gatorade Experience) to today’s newest Tiger Woods branded Gatorade has a special spot in my heart.

Michael Jackson Jordan, that venerable marketing genius who loves his pleated pants and mock neck shirts, is back on the ‘ade. Gatorade has released a new series of products honoring his career, focusing on 3 (very, very) specific aspects: 1, Game 5 of the 1997 NBA finals; 2, his continuing role in the NBA as the Charlotte Bobcats owner (?!); and 3, his time at UNC. Kind of weird to focus on, but whatevs.

MJ

MJ

The Chicago Tribune, who has plenty of reasons to love Jordan (duh) and Gatorade (it may have been invented in Florida, but they’re based in Chicago) decided to have their WINE CRITICS drink and comment on the Gatorade! I don’t know what’s more awesome - the fact that they’re reviewing Gatorade or the fact that they are asking their wine critics to do it. Here’s an excerpt from the UNC label, called “Championship blue (berry cherry blend)” :

Bright Scope peppermint blue color. Smells like Hawaiian Punch’s Fruit Juicy Red drink with lots of ripe berry scent and a slight citrus spritz. But taste is thin, like over-watered Kool-Aid. Potassium is noticeable but not overwhelming. Short, tart finish. Serve with protein bars, vanilla ice cream, Skittles.

I love the pretensious wine talk in the freaking gatorade review. The tongue-in-cheek commentary is totes not beyond me, trust me on that.